A train journey…

Reading the title, I bet all of you will wonder what new she is going to tell about the train journeys. Well actually nothing new just the latest experience of mine.


Past a few years all our journeys are night travels, or if they are day they are invariably in the AC compartment. Last week we travelled to Palakkad during the day train in the second class compartments after years.


We reached the station at 5.30 am and we find 50-60% of the people in masks protecting themselves from the spread of swine flu. Our train started at 6. And the best or the worst part was that, the 7 of us who were travelling had seats spread at two ends of the compartment.4 at one end and 3 at the other end. When we checked the chart, there were 3 of them boarding in Cantonment and we decided that we will ask them to exchange the seats so that we can sit together and we started chit chatting. We were already very hungry but were waiting for everyone to settle down. The train chugged into the Cant station. The 3 of them got it. We very politely asked them even before they put down their luggage if they could exchange the seats with ours for which there was a rude NO from them. My sister, my cousin and I were furious. And we stomped to the other end. Then my mom opened the boxes with soft yummy idlis, chutney, molagapodi(chutney powder). Mom dad, uncle aunt had their breakfast and then called. We came there and had our breakfast. It was so amazing. It was after so many years that we had taken packed food with us.


After breakfast while we 3 were walking back to our seats, a man approached and asked if we had 6 seats and if we could exchange it with him as his family wanted to be together. We mentioned to it that we had 4 seats and we could request another man so we can arrange for 5 seats. But we also warned him of the 3 rude people who didn’t oblige. He said his family would adjust in 5 seats. So we all shifted to the other seats where we got 8 seats instead of 7 as 2 people had not boarded the train. We were all thrilled and settled down after shifting our luggage. It was around 8 and I went to the upper berth and slept. When I opened my eyes it was 10.30. I looked down and what do I see. The 6 of them are munching away the savories and sweets we had got which was prepared the previous day for janmashtami. I was furious that they didn’t share it with me. So I immediately got down and had my share J Then Nandu(my sis) and I started reading our books listening to music and chatting. The view outside the train was beautiful. We were wondering what fun it was to sit on the window silo d the train as kids and also how small we could have been to fit there.


My cousin walked across the compartment and then came back excitedly and asked us to go and have a look near our old seats. Nandu and I went and saw that the man who had rudely said no was sitting so uncomfortably at the edge of the seat as the big family of 12 was occupying the seats and had comfortable seated themselves. We were so thrilled and told each other that he deserved this for being rude and not being co operative.


It was 1230 and we started feeling hungry again. Mom opened the yummy lemon rice, curd rice, chips, mango pickle, gongura pickle and vepalakatti. We all filled our paper plates with rice. It was fun balancing the plate and not spilling anything with the movement of the train. I finished the lunch and climbed back to the berth. The next thing I knew was we were approaching Palakkad and I had to get up. The train was late and we reached Palakkad only 3.00, while the expected time was 2.


It was really amazing to have packed food and fun like old times in a second class compartment. We really tend to miss this fun for the so called luxury of the packaged readymade food and comfort of AC compartment. Looking forward for another journey soon J

Touch ...

Standing in the bus stand, getting into a bus, walking alone be it in crowded street or a solitary lane every woman faces it day in and day out. Men just come brush against you, grope you in all possible places, pinch you, stare at you awkwardly, and pass comments. Ask men, and they would say we woman ask for it by dressing in a certain way, or walking down a lane or going out late in the night. Is a salwar clad girl, who does not show skin other than her hands, feet and face spared of this? Why should we be scared to walk down a lane, isn’t this world as much ours as it is of the men?

Early morning, finish all the chores at home and head to the office, and there is a conductor waiting to touch your hand, or touch you and say move inside. Can’t he speak without touching? And that touch, my god, just brings chills down your spine. And all we women can do is to give stares or at the most scold him or blast him. And this we can probably do if we are in a crowded place. If it is an isolated area, we can’t dare to think that way even if we know how to fight back, as they could just do anything with the sheer physical strength that they have. Do men ever realize what kind of impact it leaves on a woman?

Every woman goes through this so called eve teasing all through her life irrespective of her age. When someone says eve teasing, people only take into consideration they is a physical abuse and the girl is injured. Isn’t all the mental trauma we undergo not considered as eve teasing? It is very easy for people to say you need to fight back and such things keep happening only because you keep quite. When it happens day in and day out, how long can one fight? This is probably one another thing, we women just learn to “adjust and accept” and move on. Hope men stop doing this! I guess this is where we women have to start to learn to stand up. Well people reading this might think I am sounding feminist. What else can I sound like? But how do we stand up and escape this mental trauma is still something I can’t find an answer to.

I got back at him

I was so thrilled when this happened day before.

I was standing in a crowded bus. It was pouring cats and dogs. And at a signal the driver turns back at me and asks “Ellinda hege hogbeku” (How do I go from here) I grinned from ear to ear and said take right.
I was so thrilled that I got even with a bus driver, though not the same one, who had laughed at me.

Read http://anagha-prasad.sulekha.com/blog/post/2004/06/one-of-my-embarassing-moments.htm to understand why I am so thrilled.

Beauty lies within

There is program in one of the radio channels which is more like an agony aunt where a person with a problem calls up and the listeners suggest their solutions. One of the days when I was listening to it, a girl who was around 23 called up and said that she has a major inferiority complex that she is not beautiful. This was her major problem because of which she shies away from people and every failure, obstacle or an issue she faces in personal or professional life she feels it is because of this and girls more beautiful than her always surpass her. My friend who was listening to it said, what a girl! Actually girls are like this. This is not a big deal and she should move on. The listeners also gave similar suggestions saying internal beauty is what is important and not the external beauty. Some said she should go in for a makeover.

It is easy to say all girls are like this. But when a girl sees that others are perceived as very beautiful and she thinks herself as less beautiful and finds faults in herself, it is really a major setback in her life which might impede her success to life and happiness.

This just reminded me of how I was as a kid and even till a few years back. I had a major inferiority complex about my physical appearance - that I was fat, didn’t have the prescribed good facial features and hence I was not beautiful. A lot of people would say I am cute but I thought they were just telling this as they can’t say I am fat. This is had made me feel very bad and I was kind of drawn in a shell. I would avoid doing certain things, or going to certain places where I have to meet strangers. Even when I went for parties I would always feel that people are criticizing me for my appearance.

Well in 20s people started telling me that I was pretty and attractive. I still didn’t get my confidence. I don’t know when it dawned to me. I don’t know when I told myself. But it happened. I am glad it happened to be. I realized that if we are confident of what we are, our values in life, our personality, the way we conduct ourselves and just be ourselves, we will definitely be perceived as attractive. Each person has his or her own beauty. They should be proud of it. The world calls Aishwarya beautiful. But there are loads of people who say her beauty is very plastic, where Sushmita Sen has that warmth and persona which makes her beautiful though she might not have the perfect features like Ash. If we feel good about ourselves from within it will definitely reflect on our outside. And at the end of the day if we are happy then we see everything around us great and we will perceive it in the right way.

“ Beauty lies within “. If we learn to appreciate ourselves and be confident of the beauty within us, then eyes of every beholder will find us beautiful.